Sunday, November 28, 2004
my holidays have started...i havent posted in a couple of months...the last time was in august :(...i guess i stopped cos i chose to live my life rather than document it...but...i thought that i should let some stuff out of my system...i have needed to for a while...but i thought thats what best friends were for...i thought i could go to my best friend at any time and talk about things...have a phone call without his mum yelling...and if she did, he could at least tell her that he DOES happen to have a best friend...*sigh* i guess typing it here lets me get it out...but id rather have someone to depend on and talk to than a screen...not very...exciting. i can guarantee one thing...i am never going to post again once my best friend starts talking to me like how i thought we were sposed to...maybe im too, needy?...too...controlling?...perhaps im just a loser who doesnt know shit about anything...*sigh*...all i want is to be able to talk to him...and have him talk back...thats what i really want...i talk to him all the time..but he hardly replies :(...i wish there was some way of telling him how important to me it was that i had him there...to talk to and to hear stuff from...to get advice from...or maybe ill be stuck posting on this blog forever...hoping this inanimate computer can relieve my pains :(
