Wednesday, December 01, 2004

wow...i never thought id long so much to work...but maybe its not that i want to work, but moreso work where i can talk to my bro and im not around complete so damned bored...the One Tree Hill series im downloading is pretty good so far...only got a tiny tiny 3.4% left!...then finally the entire first series is mine mwahahaha still so bored :(...i wish i had been able to go to ikea today with my bro *sigh*...guess another time...hopefully tomorrow...either way im going in to work every day that i can...i MUST get out of this damned house...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...hmm and i wish i were flying to darwin too...this worl is so cruel...nobody can look after me...hopefully this weekend i will fly out...and then...whoa! darwinia...but i kno ill be missing here so much...missing the life...missing the people...and most of all, missing my brother. this year has flown past so fast...i started noticing the years going by much faster in grade 10...then year 11 went by and then yr 12 went even im in university, seperated from those i grew up around and who knew me so well...but ive found that, some things in life, u just cant explain. i really cant explain some things in my life...mainly to do with pete...but before, i just HAD to have an explanation for coming here...and meeting those that i have...ive found that not everything needs an explanation...just needs to be experienced...and thats what im doing :)...what used to mean so much to me, the things i stood by so firmly, no seem so...meaningless and pointless. i dont need to be wearing designer clothes...i dont need to be driving fancy cars...i dont need to always have wads of money and spend it each and every day...what i need now is my friends, most importantly my best friend, and i need to enjoy my life...fill it with happiness and wonderful memories so that maybe one day, when i have kids, i can pass it on to them and they can gain from that. one thing ive learnt that nobody should ever forget, is that if you care about someone, or love someone, then tell them. it would kill you if they slipped away from you and never knew how much you loved and cared for them. and also, never be afraid to open yourself up. choose wisely though...i had such a very hard time trusting people...i still do...but ive become very goood at knowing who to trust and who not to. the difference now is that those i do trust, i do open up to, not like before when i would shut everyone out. those that you trust, let into your heart...for it can only make you happy. what will bring you even greater happiness, is finding someone who truly means the world to you...who u truly would give up anything for, including your life...someone who you couldnt live without and who is there for all the happy times and the bad...and most importantly, someone to lean on when times are tough. when you have found that person, you have found your best friend...and a best friend for life, i promise you.


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