i'm getting really sick of life. everyone around me is being an asshole, and no, it isnt just me imagining it, or it actually me being the asshole and not them.

my father is a jerk cos he has gone and had an affair, broken up the family, and witholding money cos he is going to new zealand with his floozy. but he tells us that he has no money and that he cant even buy me a bday present. *clears throat* ahem EXCUSE ME FUCKER, BUT YOU EARN MORE THAN $7000 A WEEK, STOP LYING THROUGH YOUR BACK TEETH LIKE YOU LIED ABOUT THE AFFAIR, LIKE YOU THEN LIED ABOUT WHO IT WAS WITH, AND YOU THEN LIED ABOUT HOW SERIOUS IT WAS. JUST STOP FUCKING LYING.

oh and did i mention that he promised to give me something (not a bday present) and then he gave it to my sister instead?...oh yes, thats very fair, isnt it "father". not to mention all the other shit he seems to be doing, which is holding things over my head to try to get to mum therefore using me as a pawn which is a really pissweak thing to do, he also tries to integrate that stupid slut he is with in with his own children which really isnt that nice, and im expected to go along with his "mr nice guy" charade when that bitch is around, or i can expect to miss out on things, what things i dont know.

and then there's my mother. yes, she is a victim in this whole mess, but i am really getting sick and tired of how she just expects to have free reign over my office, over my computer whenever she finds me not there. yes fine, she can use it, but when i need it, she can get her fucking ass out of my office cos im a uni student and i have study to do. there are 3 other computers in the house, GO FUCKING USE ONE OF THEM.

and yet another thing, she has this spineless method of trying to threaten people if she doesnt get her way. yeh "mum", thats really gutless to threaten ur own child...

and not to forget my bitchy sister, the one who tries to play one parent off against another to get the most out of each one, driving my mother to her wits end, her father just gives her whatever she wants EVEN THOUGH he amazingly has no money (although he is in the highest tax bracket, has 4 cars and like i mentioned before, certainly isnt slumming it with what he earns)...and of course, she decides to be a bitch and park in my parking spot, so i move her car, and then she storms out, doesnt come home for days, my mother blames me when it wasnt my fault (thanks mum! bitch) and threatens me that if alana hurts herself, it will be on my head.

yes, very classy from my family. i just love the way im in the middle of it when its got nothing to do with me.

but it doesnt stop there! oh no, theres another person who is very important to me, and who equally likes shifting blame, not accepting their own fault, and making fights...and thats none other than peter lam! my supposed "best friend" who lets just say, isnt what he says he is. anyway, getting down to it, ever since we met he has slowly but surely become lazy, decided that he doesnt really give a stuff if he knows im always gonna be around, so he just cant be fucked with being a good person, or anything else for that matter. its never his fault, OH NO, god forbid something be his fault, he will argue and whine and moan until you either tell himt o fuck off, or you say he is right, and its at that point that once again, i have done something wrong by trying to get him off my fucking back. he has no faults, he is never to blame, and all the fights we have, are never started by him!...yes, alls good with peter, its just not his fault. but he can be rude! not his fault tho!, its MY fault somehow for HIM being rude and not knowing how to be a decent person and know when to keep his mouth shut. yep. thats MY fault.

fantastic guy right! yeh i love him so much. oh and did i mention that he is never there with a shoulder to lean on or an ear to listen with, noooooooo, i have to go elsewhere for that!...but hey, i think in these modern times, we must be expecting too much of the important people in our lives. yes thats it!

if u hadnt noticed, i was being sarcastic in that last part. so pls dont think im making no sense, im making PERFECT sense...cos i speak ENGLISH, unlike SOME people.

anyway, thats all i have to say right now. dad, mum, sis and bf, all people who are supposed to be decent individuals, but juuuust dont quite manage it. fuck this world. honestly, it can all go to fucking hell.